Wednesday, April 8

Scripture: John 20:24-29
Now Thomas, one of the Twelve, called the Twin, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails, and place my hand into his side, I will never believe.”

Eight days later, his disciples were inside again, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here, and see my hands; and put out your hand, and place it in my side. Do not disbelieve, but believe.” Thomas answered him, “My Lord and my God!” Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.”

GRACE FOR THOSE WHO DOUBT
St. Thomas the Apostle
By Malcolm Guite

‘We do not know . . . how can we know the way?
Courageous master of the awkward question,
You spoke the words the others dared not say
And cut through their evasion and abstraction.
O doubting Thomas, father of my faith,
You put your finger on the nub of things:
We cannot love some disembodied wraith,
But flesh and blood must be our king of kings.
Your teaching is to touch, embrace, anoint,
Feel after him and find him in the flesh.
Because he loved your awkward counterpoint,
The Word has heard and granted you your wish.
O place my hands with yours, help me divine
The wounded God whose wounds are healing mine.

In his rendering of Doubting Thomas, which echoes Rembrandt, artist René Klarenbeek’s Christ and apostles transcend the centuries becoming men we might see on the street today. This technique makes it a bit harder to excuse ourselves from the scene. Jesus, once again in the midst of those who had been closest to him, wears an expression of matter-of-factness. It’s practically nonchalance, as his nail scarred hand guides Thomas’s finger into his wounded side. Note that the rest of the apostles do not exactly appear to be disinterested. In fact, they seem just as curious as Thomas, leaning into Jesus but keeping their hands off. Thomas, however, goes to the heart of the matter. Or as Malcolm Guite writes in the above sonnet, “You put your finger on the nub of things...” Thomas not only puts his finger on the question of the Lord’s bodily resurrection, he also puts his finger on the nub of all things— the Creator himself (John 1:3).

Only eight days earlier the others had witnessed a manifestation of the risen Christ. He had shown them his hands and his side but there is no account of them touching his body. Perhaps after a few days some of them had begun to have their own doubts: Was it really Jesus? Were we wrong? Was it only his ghost after all?

How blessed we are who have “believed and yet not seen!” Much of the credit for our blessedness is due to Thomas’s honest skepticism. He took the initiative and did what the others needed him to do—what we needed him to do, so that we might have confidence that the our risen Savior was not only seen and heard, but also touched (1 John 1:1).

Jesus’s antidote for Thomas’s doubt was not found in his performance of yet another miracle. He did not engage Thomas in an extended dialogue about faith. He did not reprimand him nor did he magically remove his doubts. He simply acquiesced to Thomas’s heart-felt need for evidence and invited Thomas to touch him.

How does a child touch the heart of her parent? What would it mean for me to touch the heart of Jesus; rather than just ‘leaning in with my head,’ gathering information and intellectualizing?

Would he be touched by my asking the hardest questions? By inviting him into the middle of my doubts? By touching his wounded body, the Church? By touching “the least of these,” (Mat 25:35-40)?

PRAYER
“Lord, I believe; help thou my unbelief” (Mark 9:24). 
Amen.

Pat Conneen, Spiritual Director, Institute of Spiritual Formation