December 30: Two Become One; Marriage a Great Mystery
♫ Music:
Day 30 - Monday, December 30
Title: Two Become One; Marriage a Great Mystery
Scripture #1: Ephesians 5:25-27, 30-33 (NKJV)
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. . . .For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
Scripture #2: 1 Corinthians 6:17
But he who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him.
Poetry:
“On Mariage”
by Meghan O’Rourke
Stone by stone, body by body in the grass:
For this we trade our lone compass,
Become swans instead, adrift in glaze-
Light, kilned in the arms of each other
Into vessel-vassal new. Or shrew,
As the case may be. What would you do?
Listen to the footsteps in the thistles.
Put the kettle on for tea, and whisper it to me.
TWO BECOME ONE; MARRIAGE A GREAT MYSTERY
The pandemic took its toll on many marriages.
The stresses of lockdown, constantly shifting plans of how to return, and the rush to make up for lost time wore on us as individuals. By late 2021 my wife and I realized we had both undergone physiological changes. We wrestled with a variety of clinically diagnosed issues such as depression and anxiety. It was difficult to recognize ourselves, and by extension, each other and our relationship.
This experience connected me quickly to today’s artwork from Micah Parker, With This Ring II, a ketubah that depicts two rings intertwined, placed above a verse, Song of Songs 6:3. The imagery represents not only the individuality of each person, but a stronger unit created when two are joined.
The earthly institution of the marriage relationship is intended to mirror the eternal relationship of our union with God in Christ. Our earthly marriage will of course never be perfect, but it is in that imperfection that truths about the depth of our Father’s love are revealed. When I felt as though I did not recognize elements of our marriage anymore, I feared we were on the starting path to separation. Divorce is considered “contagious.” A study done by Pew Research in 2013 found 75% of participants were more likely to divorce if a friend first divorced. Socially it becomes a more viable option. In our own friend group, we found this to be very true.
I eventually realized my fears were based on bad experiences from past relationships, what was happening with others, and the unknown – not my knowledge of what I knew to be true about our relationship. Fear was leading me to be assumptive, less communicative, and reactionary in ways that were not loving to my wife.
But as we know from 1 John 4:18, “perfect love casts out fear.” Your love for someone else can only grow in relation to the extent to which you commit to that love. Love cannot increase without sacrifice and commitment. Take a second and read the last sentence again. A great thematic irony widely accepted in Christian belief is that one must “die to self” to find genuine life. Such is the case in marriage – I had to work to kill my own pride, ego, and fear for us to continue to move forward as one.
Prayer:
Father God, thank you for loving us so much that you made the ultimate sacrifice. During this season of advent, I pray that we are all reminded of the selfless nature of love, and that we become more intentional about responding to others in love, rather than from places of fear. Father, this is rarely easy to do in difficult moments – help us to have your eyes and your heart for your children as we interact with others.
Amen.
*Please keep in mind this devotional is not referring to relationships with abuse. If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, the national hotline in the U.S. is 1-800-799-7293.
Zachary Bortot, M.F.A.
Associate Professor of Theatre
Theatre Arts Division Director
Collinsworth School of Performing Arts
California Baptist University
Riverside, California
For more information about the artwork, music, and poetry selected for this day, we have provided resources under the “About” tab located next to the “Devotional” tab.
About the Artwork:
With This Ring II
Micah Parker
Contemporary Ketubah
20 x 20 in.
A Ketubah is a Jewish marriage contract. It is considered an integral part of a traditional Jewish marriage, and outlines the rights and responsibilities of the groom in relation to the bride. In modern practice, the ketubah has no monetary value, and is seldom enforced by civil courts, except in Israel. This ketubah features two interconnected rings surrounded by delicate ornamentation and incorporates antique elements of European Renaissance and Persian design. In the center of each ring is the popular wedding phrase from the Song of Songs "I am my beloved’s, and my beloved is mine"/"Ani l'dodi v'dodi li”—in English on one ring, in Hebrew on the other. This design is a beautiful representation of the double ring ceremony in which both partners exchange rings to symbolize their mutual respect of one another, the wholeness achieved through marriage, and their hope for an unbroken bond and lifetime commitment. The interconnection of the two rings signifies the union of two lives forever entwined, where both husband and wife retain their own individuality but at the same time form a stronger, united soul.
https://ketubahstudio.com/products/and-my-beloved-is-mine-ketubah
About the Artist:
Artist Micah Parker has been creating fine-art ketubahs for over twenty-five years, making it a full-time business in 1996. He was the first to marry the digital art and printing process with the centuries-old Jewish marriage contract. This allowed him to create beautiful, customizable ketubah designs and texts for those who couldn’t afford an original hand-painted ketubah, but didn’t want to settle for a fill-in-the-blank, preprinted one. Micah’s artistic vision also took the art of the ketubah in a modern direction. His designs employ traditional elements, but they can also be abstract, expressionistic, minimalistic, and sometimes even irreverent. To increase the artistic variety, Micah has started licensing and incorporating designs and artwork from other fine artists. He has helped over forty thousand brides and grooms find the perfect ketubah to commemorate their wedding ceremony.
About the Music: “Love Divine, All Loves Excelling” from the album HM Queen: The Commemorative Album
Lyrics:
Love divine, all loves excelling,
Joy of heaven to earth come down;
Fix in us thy humble dwelling;
All thy faithful mercies crown!
Jesus, Thou art all compassion,
Pure unbounded love Thou art;
Visit us with Thy salvation;
Enter every trembling heart.
Come, Almighty to deliver,
Let us all Thy grace receive;
Suddenly return and never,
Never more Thy temples leave.
Thee we would be always blessing,
Serve Thee as Thy hosts above,
Pray and praise Thee without ceasing,
Glory in Thy perfect love.
Finish, then, Thy new creation;
Pure and spotless let us be.
Let us see Thy great salvation
Perfectly restored in Thee;
Changed from glory into glory,
Till in heaven we take our place,
Till we cast our crowns before Thee,
Lost in wonder, love, and praise.
About the Composers: Lyrics: Charles Wesley, Music: William Penfro Rowlands
Charles Wesley (1707–1788) was an English leader of the Methodist movement and is most widely known for writing the words for over 6,500 hymns. His most famous works include "And Can It Be,” "Christ the Lord Is Risen Today," "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing,” and "Lo! He Comes with Clouds Descending.” He was a younger brother of Methodist founder John Wesley and Anglican cleric Samuel Wesley the Younger. Educated at Oxford University, where his brothers had also studied, Charles followed his father into the church in 1735. Following their evangelical conversions in 1738, the Wesley brothers traveled throughout Britain, converting followers to the Methodist revival through preaching and hymn singing. It has been said that Charles Wesley usually celebrated each anniversary of his birthday by writing a hymn of praise to God. On his spiritual birthday—the first anniversary of his conversion—he celebrated by writing one of the most beloved hymns still in use today among Methodists—“O For a Thousand Tongues to Sing.” The hymn was placed first in John Wesley's A Collection of Hymns for the People Called Methodists, published in 1780. It was the first hymn in every (Wesleyan) Methodist hymnal from that time until the publication of Hymns and Psalms in 1983.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Wesley
William Penfro Rowlands (1860–1937) was a Welsh school teacher and composer. Probably his best-known composition is the hymn tune "Blaenwern,” composed in 1905 and often used as the setting for “Love Divine, All Loves Excelling.” As well as being a church musician, Rowlands taught in several schools and was conductor of the Morriston United Choral Society.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Penfro_Rowlands
About the Performers: Wallingford Parish Church Choir and the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra
Wallingford Parish Church Choir is supported by several churches within the Church of England, Diocese of Oxford. Wallingford Parish Church choir has between forty-five to fifty members, aged from under eight to over eighty.
https://www.wallingfordcofe.org.uk/
The Royal Philharmonic Orchestra (RPCO) is a dynamic and versatile ensemble that performs a wide range of styles and genres of music in shows across the UK and around the world. The orchestra’s repertoire includes film music, video game scores, music from the musicals, and symphonic arrangements of classic rock and pop songs, as well as new commissions and the traditional core classical repertoire, reaching an audience of over 170,000 live listeners per year. The orchestra is a regular visitor to the Royal Albert Hall. In 2023, the RPCO made its debut at the British Summer Time Festival in London’s Hyde Park, giving the festival’s first orchestral concert since it began in 2013. Further recent highlights for the RPCO include multiple performances with the Italian tenor Andrea Bocelli, as well as concerts with José Carreras, Anna Netrebko, and the stars of the West End stage, such as Kerry Ellis, Alfie Boe, and Ruthie Henshall.
https://www.rpo.co.uk/about/rpco
About the Poetry & Poet:
Meghan O’Rourke (b. 1976) is an American nonfiction writer, poet, and critic. She earned a B.A. in English language and literature from Yale University in 1997 and a master of fine arts degree in poetry from Warren Wilson College in 2005. Immediately after graduating from Yale, O'Rourke began an internship as an editor at The New Yorker. She was promoted to fiction/nonfiction editor in 2000. In 2002, O'Rourke moved to the online magazine Slate, serving as culture and literary editor until 2009 and as founding editor of DoubleX, a section of Slate that focused on women’s issues. She has published poems in literary journals and magazines including The New Yorker, Best American Poetry, The New Republic, and Poetry. O'Rourke's first book of poems, Halflife, was published in 2007. Her book The Long Goodbye, a memoir of grief and mourning written after her mother's death, was published to wide critical acclaim in 2011. In 2019, O'Rourke became editor of The Yale Review, coinciding with the two hundredth anniversary of its founding.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Meghan_O'Rourke
About the Devotion Author:
Zachary Bortot, M.F.A.
Associate Professor of Theatre
Theatre Arts Division Director
Collinsworth School of Performing Arts
California Baptist University
Riverside, California
Zachary Bortot is an Associate Professor of Theatre and the Director of the Theatre Arts Division in the Shelby and Ferne Collinsworth School of Performing Arts at California Baptist University. Prior to his time at CBU, he served as the Artistic Director for Biola University's Theatre Program, as well as the Director of Development for the Chicago-based nonprofit Christian theatre company Honest Theatre. In his career he has spent years working as an actor, director, producer, fight director, writer, and instructor in a variety of locales and venues in the US, both on stage and screen. He recently starred as King Hal in Henry V for the Courtyard Shakespeare Festival. This spring he is directing Lauren Gunderson’s The Book of Will at CBU. You can see him next as Sebastian in Rebel Run Studio’s science-fiction film adaptation of Shakespeare’s The Tempest.